New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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