she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
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