Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
thus making me awesome and them whores
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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