turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
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