Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
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