Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Randomize