I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Randomize