Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
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