The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
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