Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Randomize