I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize