I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
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