she was so not down for the gang bang
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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