i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
This is classic penis vs brain.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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