I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
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it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
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the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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