She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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