You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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