That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
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