do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
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