tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
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