She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
I take back everything I said about communal showers
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
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