Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Randomize