I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
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