Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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