She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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