I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
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You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
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i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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