So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
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