His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
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