The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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