I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
They have beer where we have blood.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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