I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize