separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Randomize