so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
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Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
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I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
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