pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
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