im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
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