How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Randomize