I cockslap morals
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
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