Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
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As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
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Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
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