Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize