I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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