Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Randomize