If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
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