Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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