Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
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Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
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