it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
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