I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
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