you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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