dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
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Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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