dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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