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I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
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